So the main prompt is: Choose ONE disagreement/conflict that you are having with someone in your life. Using the pillow method, examine/analyze this disagreement by describing and explaining the five different positions (perspectives) for this situation.
Position One- I’m right and you’re wrong – This is the perspective we usually take when viewing an issue. We can easily see the virtues of our own position so it isn’t hard to detail them. You should describe and explain what the conflict is between you and the other person and why you think you are in the “right” about this issue.
Position Two – You’re right and I am wrong – At this point you switch perspectives and build the strongest possible arguments to explain how others can see the issue differently than you. You are playing the devil’s advocate and finding strengths in the other’s position while finding flaws in yours. Note: This doesn’t mean you are approving of the other person’s behavior, but just trying to realize how to understand it.
Position Three – Both right, both wrong – From this position you acknowledge both the strengths and weaknesses of each person’s argument. Describe and explain the strengths and weaknesses of both of your arguments—especially looking for commonalities between your position (how you are BOTH right and commonalities as to how you might BOTH be wrong).
Position Four – The issue isn’t important – The importance of a dispute can fade when you realize you’ve let it overshadow other equally important parts of your relationship. Explore these now. What aspects of your relationship with the other are more important than this dispute? How does this conflict bring light to what IS and ISN’T important in your relationship with the other person.
Position Five – There’s truth in all perspectives – Recognize that each perspective has some merit. What are these truths? What insights have you gained? In this section, you should write about what you have learned having gone through this type of analysis. These insights may not cause you to change your mind or even solve the problem, but can help you clarify some of the issues in hopes of improving your tolerance and the communication climate of the discussion you can have with the other person about this issue, and this could lead to effective resolution.
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